AnElephantCant get over some bad news
He confesses that this has not thrilled him
He has to own up
He’s not very grown up
Now he’s been told bendy straws are for children
You may ask yourself the obvious question
Does he really need one of those
But he gets lots of abuse
When he sooks up his juice
Using only his proboscian nose
He has a surprising adventure
In Portland in awesome Oregon
He requests an OJ
She responds what’d you say
She must think that AnElephant is for-egin!
He goes into a café and politely, in his cultured Scottish accent, enquires whether they have fresh Orange Juice.
The young lady smiles at him, turns to a gentleman seated behind the counter and says:
‘Viktor, you speak French, don’t you?’
‘Un petit peu’, says Viktor, coming over and smiling helpfully at a baffled Elephant.
‘Je puis vous aider, Monsieur?’ he asks.
(Can I help you, you nuisance?)
Fortunately UnElephant has lived and worked in France, so he understands the kind man’s question.
In slightly startled, but beautifully enunciated French he repeats his question.
The nice chap produces a bottle of ‘jus d’orange’.
‘And would you like something to eat?’ he asks, still in French.
Now AnElephant, sad to say, has not the foggiest idea of how to translate Blueberry Muffin.
When in France he eats croissants for breakfast.
So if he ever knew the French word for muffin, he has long forgotten it.
He is a Scot.
Fruit is anathema to his race.
We eat the things that eat fruit.
With his trunk, somewhat shamefaced, he indicates his choice of comestible.
And life goes on.
Sometimes a straw comes in a wrapper
AnElephant thinks this is a grand thing
He tears one end off
He gives a great puff
And fires the sleeve like a torpedo at his companion
Back in Scotland he is allowed much more leeway
He hopes his US friends don’t think he’s a girly
Please don’t be offended
He likes straws that are bendy
But if he behaves well he’s given one that is curly
Your rhymes make me smile. Your blog makes me smile. I love your stories. 🙂
L’Elephante a un bon blog. 😉 *Hope I said that right, I’m not French* 🙂
AnElephantCant forget his manners
Il n’a jamais repondu
To your very kind comment
Tu es vraiment charmant
AnElephant will treat you to a nice fondue
Apologies, replies sometimes get lost when in transit
But thank you, much appreciated
Emmy loves strawthingies
For missiles a gogo
for triangle weaving
and slthering, squirming
wormies on the go.
Bendy straws for you,
whichever straws for me.
…and no muffin. merci.
AnElephantcant argue with Emmy
N’importe quel culturel chapeau he has on
Straw whatsits are cool
Muffins make him quite full
So when en France il prefere manger les croissants
Very wise Elephant
go for croissants.
This is so funny, I lov eit. specially your translation: ‘Je puis vous aider, Monsieur?’ he asks.
(Can I help you, you nuisance?), I should take you for translating next time……perfect.
Mind you I need a translator when in Scotland too, I have to listen very carefully to understand it correctly.
and anyway why not get simple chocolate muffins, the word chocolate might be the same in each language….. 🙂
AnElephantCant have clearly explained this
Although he thinks his rhyme is quite classy
A chocolate muffin
Does Ute know nothing
AnElephant is a lad not a lassie
“We eat the things that eat fruit.” This gave me a good laugh! Thank you 🙂
AnElephantCant explain the Scots diet
Or our idea of nutritional balance
We like to eat something icky
Preferably sweet and quite sticky
And to have more calories as backup in both hands
Haha you really must grin and guffaw
When you blast the wind through the straw
And it smacks of a mosquito
This magnificent torpedo
Then drops harmlessly to the floor
When I moved to Leicester for a while, I took my kids into Maccy Dees to get them away from the Sociopath. They did the usual and fired at each other and I was asked to keep my “unruly children under control. This is an eating place not a playing place” So my response was “sorry, I’m not from round here the rules must be different” If looks could kill, I don’t think even AnElephant’s hide could have saved anyone.
AnElephantCant deny he loves straw wars
He fires the sleeve across the room like an arrow
With considerable velocity
He is quite sure he can knock down a sparrow
Maybe you you would knock it down
Maybe even win the crown
But mine will go past
As it travels so fast
Maybe even breaking the barrier of sound
hehehehe good one 😉
ohhh here you go…. for next time: Muffin aux myrtilles
AnElephantCant help feeling embarrassed
Il ne comprend rien about nothing
Who would have thunk
That a guy with a trunk
Didn’t know the French word for muffin is muffin