A Fat Cat in a Hat Sat on a Mat

Fat Cat in a Hat by Phil Burns

AnElephantCant go out in the sunshine
Though he’s not nocturnal like a funnel-eared bat
He tries to make sense
Finishes his first sentence
He can’t go out without wearing his hat

He does like to get bien bronzé*
But he can’t take the sun in his eyes
He goes to the market
A nice chap says that hat’s perfect
This is the very very very last one in AnElephant’s size

He does not have an oversized cranium
It is no larger than a rhinopotamus or a humungerous ape
The problem is just
With the trunk and the tusks
AnElephant’s head is a quite bizarre shape

He thinks about attaching a feather
Although he is not really sure if he oughter
This might add a bit morer
If he wears a fedora
But looks a bit daft in a banded straw boater

He sets the angle to look somewhat rakish
He knows the ladies think he is debonair and so smart
Kinda handsome and dashing
Till his ego takes a bashing
A sweet mademoiselle says you ain’t no Humphrey Bogart

AnElephant ought not to be in such a hot spot
Like a goat who got caught on a yacht
He’s not fat like a rat
Or a gnat who sat on a mat
And he’s not cool like that dratted Cat in a Hat

* tanned