Monthly Archives: December 2012

Breakfast in America

Posted on December 31, 2012 by AnElephantCant

AnElephantCant argue that breakfast In the US is a substantial meal In Scotland our porridge Fills us up for a forage But over here the choices make AnElephant’s head reel The waiting staff are always so friendly Good morning and … Continue reading →

Posted in Daft Rhymes, humour | Tagged america, bacon, banana, belgian waffles, breakfast, french toast, omelette, orange juice, over easy, pancakes, pecan, porridge, sausage, scrambled eggs, strawberry, syrup, tiffany's, usa, zeus | 16 Comments

Alliterative Onomatopoetic Oxymorons

Posted on December 30, 2012 by AnElephantCant

AnElephantCant claim to be erudite He just wasn’t very well teached At speling and gramer He’ll just yammer and stammer But he still plans to discuss figures of speech Alliteration is likeably laughable Fine folk fairly foolishly find funny A … Continue reading →

Posted in Daft Rhymes, humour | Tagged alliteration, anagram, friendly fire, grammar, litotes, metaphor, military intelligence, onomatopoeia, oxymoron, spelling | 17 Comments

Upgrade Upset Uptight

Posted on December 29, 2012 by AnElephantCant

AnElephantCant deny he’s a thicko He really is as dumb as a rock Not very clever Should never ever ever Try to change anything cos he is a thick Jock He finds it isn’t easy being grey As that fabulous … Continue reading →

Posted in Daft Rhymes, humour | Tagged 50 shades, dumb as a rock, gremlins, kermit, lurking, menus, themes, widgets | 21 Comments

Perfectly Puzzled

Posted on December 27, 2012 by AnElephantCant

The picture on the wall shows people leaping From the cliffs into the waters far below She hopes to stay wrapped in his arms till morning But fears the clock hands move round far too slow He hears her call … Continue reading →

Posted in Poetry | Tagged back stairs, cliffs, clock hands, desire, down the drain, empty bottles, floor, head and shoulder, lemmings, other side, puzzle, staircase | 14 Comments

East is West and the Twain shall Meet

Posted on December 26, 2012 by AnElephantCant

AnElephantCant help thinking that people Are pretty much the same all over the world He doesn’t care about religion Or the colour of the skin Although he admits he likes guys less than girls You find bonzer blokes way Down … Continue reading →

Posted in Daft Rhymes, humour | Tagged all over the world, american, ami, australia, blarney, c'est bon, cork, down under, fair dinkum, francais, France, french, handshake, ireland, killarney, people, religion, scotland, skin colour, stout, usa, vin blanc | 11 Comments

Dreaming of a White Elephant ….

Posted on December 24, 2012 by AnElephantCant

AnElephantCant stay calm when it’s Xmas If anything he acts even dafter As the seasonal bells jingle He feels his tactile trunk tingle And his ears flap with joy at the laughter He hopes this Xmas will be a white … Continue reading →

Posted in Daft Rhymes, humour | Tagged christmas, happy new year, jelly, mince pie, reindeer, santa, sleigh, tinsel, white christmas, white elephant, xmas, xmas tree | 15 Comments

The Same Difference

Posted on December 24, 2012 by AnElephantCant

AnElephantCant always travel by foot He needs transport befitting his status He rents a cool Chevy To drive to the levee But sadly he has no idea what that is You both know that your Elephant is no thick-head There … Continue reading →

Posted in Daft Rhymes, humour | Tagged bonnet, cell phone, chevy, cv, gear lever, hood, language, left field, levee, mobile, resume, shift stick, states, steering wheel, trunk, windscreen, windshield, zed, zee | 10 Comments

Travel and Strife

Posted on December 23, 2012 by AnElephantCant

AnElephantCant decide how to travel There are options he is not at a loss He can go for a hike He can get on his bike Or ride a cock horse to Banbury Cross He is determined to depart San … Continue reading →

Posted in Daft Rhymes, humour | Tagged america, america's cup, amtrak, apple mac, banbury cross, bay, bob marley, cattle ranch, cock horse, comanche, dumbo, golden gate, greyhound, harley, jumbo, mid-west, pea green boat, pittsburgh, san francisco, stagecoach, wagon train | 5 Comments

State of Independence

Posted on December 22, 2012 by AnElephantCant

AnElephantCant decide where to head to Now that he has to leave San Francisco He is kinda useless Can’t spell Massachusetts So that means New England’s a no-go He’s not sure whether to head north or southwards If you are … Continue reading →

Posted in Daft Rhymes, humour | Tagged arkansas, california, canada, dc, everglades, florida, french quarter, georgetown, house of the rising sun, idaho, iowa, jambalaya, jazz, kansas, kentucky, keys, la, los ageles, massachusetts, new england, new orleans, ohio, oklahoma, oregon, richmond virginia, san francisco, tennessee, texas, utah, vancouver, washington | 11 Comments

AnElephant Left His Heart in San Francisco

Posted on December 21, 2012 by AnElephantCant

AnElephantCant stay here forever Although he certainly will come back again From the very first day His soul soars away This is the coolest place he has ever been He has seen great cities and been lots of great places … Continue reading →